What kind of leader are you? really?
What if you walked into work one day and discovered that your manager was essentially you? Same mindset, same habits, same approach to leadership. Would that version of you make you feel motivated and supported, or would you start quietly questioning your decision to stay?
This is the Mirror Test, a concept originally used in behavioural science to assess self-awareness in animals. It determines whether an animal recognises its own reflection by observing behaviours like inspecting, touching, or attempting to remove a visible mark on its body. According to hrdqu.com, the idea of self-recognition dates back to Charles Darwin, who proposed that some animals might possess a basic form of self-awareness. But it wasn’t until 1970 that psychologist Gordon Gallup Jr. formally developed the test as a tool to study consciousness.
In a leadership context, the Mirror Test becomes something more personal: a bold exercise in self-awareness, alignment, and accountability. It challenges every leader, aspiring or experienced to ask a tough but necessary question:
“If I had to work for someone like me, would I stay motivated?”
Let’s explore the deeper layers behind that question.
1. Leadership Begins with Self-Awareness
Before you can effectively lead a team, you must first understand yourself. Self-awareness isn’t just a soft skill; it’s a leadership essential.
Ask yourself:
- Do I know how I come across under pressure?
- Do I listen to understand or to respond?
- Am I aware of how my mood affects the room?
Scenario: You’re faced with a tight deadline and feel the pressure building. As a leader, how do you respond? Do you communicate calmly, providing direction and reassurance? Or do you snap, raising the anxiety in the room? A self-aware leader knows how their emotions impact others and takes care to manage them effectively.
Self-aware leaders don’t just manage tasks; they manage energy, emotion, and impact. They’re intentional about how they show up. The mirror test helps leaders understand their strengths and weaknesses, which is crucial for making better decisions and fostering a more positive, productive environment.
2. Mind the Gap: Values vs. Behaviour
Many leaders speak about trust, innovation, or agility. But values aren’t declared, they’re demonstrated.
Consider this:
- You promote psychological safety but dismiss ideas in meetings.
- You speak of work-life balance but reward overwork.
- You preach accountability but shift blame when things go wrong.
This gap erodes trust and morale.
Scenario: You emphasise transparency and honesty, but during a critical meeting, you withhold information to avoid uncomfortable questions. This creates a disconnect between what you say and what you do, weakening your team’s trust in your leadership.
Leaders who live their values consistently, especially when it’s inconvenient, are more likely to build strong, loyal teams. They embody the principles they advocate for, leading by example in both big and small moments.
3. Influence Is Greater Than Control
True leadership is not about control; it’s about influence.
People are more likely to follow leaders who:
- Empower them to make decisions.
- Encourage ownership and autonomy.
- Create environments where learning is safe.
Ask yourself: “Am I creating a space where people can grow, or just get by?”
Scenario: Your team is faced with a difficult project. Do you micromanage, dictating every decision? Or do you trust your team to make decisions, encouraging them to take ownership? A leader who relies on influence rather than control inspires a sense of trust and accountability, which leads to a more engaged and innovative team.
Leaders who focus on influence rather than control foster an environment where team members feel supported and empowered. This leads to increased motivation and productivity.
4. Humility Is Not Optional
No leader has all the answers. The best ones know this and lead with humility.
Humble leaders:
- Invite feedback, even when it’s uncomfortable.
- Share credit and take responsibility.
- Prioritise learning over ego.
Scenario: Your team suggests a different approach to a project you’ve been overseeing. Instead of dismissing their ideas, you listen, consider their points, and adjust your approach. A humble leader is open to feedback, willing to admit when they don’t know everything, and eager to learn and grow alongside their team.
Humility is not about thinking less of yourself. It’s about thinking beyond yourself and putting the mission and the team first. Scenario: Instead of focusing on your own achievements, you recognise the efforts of your team in a public setting, ensuring they feel valued for their contributions. Humility builds a culture of collaboration and trust, where the success of the group is prioritised over individual recognition.
5. The Reflective Challenge
Growth starts with honest reflection. Take a few quiet moments this week to ask:
- Would I feel valued under my leadership?
- Would I feel challenged, yet supported?
- Would I want to grow in this environment?
Scenario: You’ve just wrapped up a tough project, and you ask yourself how your team felt during the process. Were they inspired and motivated, or did they feel drained and unsupported? By honestly reflecting on your leadership approach, you can identify areas for improvement.
Let the answers guide your next steps. Leadership isn’t about perfection; it’s about progress. It’s about identifying areas for improvement, taking action, and evolving over time.
Closing Thought
In leadership, it’s not about who you’re leading, it’s about how. The mirror doesn’t lie. It reveals whether you’re someone worth following, not just on paper, but in the day-to-day moments that shape your legacy.
So next time you ask, “What kind of leader should I be?” Start with: “Would I follow me?”
If you’re serious about stepping up your leadership game, the Master of Business Administration at Regenesys is exactly what you’re looking for. It’s not just about adding another qualification; it’s about gaining the concrete skills to lead with a clear sense of purpose, have a real influence on your team, and lead in a way that feels authentic to you. Whether you’re new to leading or want to become a more effective leader, this programme can provide you with the tools and confidence to make a significant impact.
